like, to be honest, to say he is handling at all is an overstatement. He has more or less noped out completely. He is functioning only on a very surface level, annoyed when people congratulate him, sarcastic and insulting as usual, clearly everything is fine!!
But in actuality he's had the rug pulled out from beneath him completely. First off, dying by being stabbed to death was a sudden forceful reminder that he's not in power here, and that he is vulnerable and mortal for the first time in a very long time. Fear of not being able to survive, fear of pain, BASIC HUMAN FEARS are pretty alien to him and he was bluntly introduced to them in an awful way.
He also was suddenly made aware that his tormenting March had an effect. WHICH HE DIDN'T ACTUALLY KNOW, or he would have stopped sooner. Because that's. All he wanted. He and March would fight and he would accidentally hit a weak spot or March would hit a weak spot and the other would retaliate but BASICALLY he found out the way to even the score and score one up on March was pain because then he would go quiet and STOP ATTACKING HIM which is originally all he wanted. But he is himself and he liked the rush and March never stopped fighting he always got right back up and attacked him again. So Shark had no idea he was cracking March! OR THAT HIS THREATS WERE THAT AWFUL. he does not have food buttons, he doesn't need to eat, ALICE IS NOT HERE SO WHY IS THREATENING TO TAKE HIM AWAY WHEN THE PERSON IN QUESTION DOESN'T EVEN EXIST HERE A BIG DEAL?? ONCE HE WINS IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN FUCKING ENFORCE THAT. He just wanted to stop losing. SO. HE HAD HIS WINNING TURN OUT TO BE HEY YOU ACTUALLY FUCKED UP REALLY BADLY AND WERE FUCKING UP THIS DUDE AND IT IS COMING TO BITE YOU.
his denial coping mechanism shattered hard too because suddenly comes to terms with what he's been doing + sudden oh god mortality pain stabbing MARCH FEAR. and march comes at him immediately and dismembers him and has him make a pact. he has enough presence of mind to negotiate in a clause to keep his body his own (reasons why that is important to him is a whole other mini-essay) and also to keep their contract mutable, rather than a sealed deal. BECAUSE HE HAS SOME SERIOUS CONTRACT FEAR.
but he knows he gave march serious reason to hate him. and he did give a paranoid like eight paragraph ramble of shit march could do to him if March felt like the effort and march confirmed HE HAS BETTER THINGS TO DO which basically to Shark means I will ruin you and your everything as long as it is easy, not worth the effort to do anything like that. He can't comprehend March not wanting serious vengeance if those lines he had no idea were there were crossed that badly.
And now March is basically. Crossing his lines. :')
he isn't cleaning his room from the way march wrecked it and isn't collecting new things because he's unable to hold onto anything because then it's march's and it could be taken away just to fuck with him and EVEN IF THEY AREN'T they are of no comfort to him but rather a paranoia source. he hates most his teammates now. orchard cake party confirmed that he has no allies and no one gives a fuck about what happened to him he is on his own he has screwed himself over. his denial mechanism of being able to go I WANTED THIS THIS IS WHAT I WAS AIMING FOR HAHA LOOK WHAT I CAN DO NOW is still broken. march keeps poking at him and making threats he has no intention of carrying out but shark doesn't know that and hates being reliant on that "kindness". march keeps reminding him that he fucked up and did this to himself.
also that he hasn't been rewritten is a source of scream to him because HE'S BEEN REWRITTEN BEFORE AND THAT HE HASN'T IMPLIES MARCH WANTS SOMETHING FROM HIM. BECAUSE MARCH DIDN'T CONTRACT YOU CAN NOW NEVER HURT ME AGAIN, it was for full control. So if he wants full control and apparently doesn't want a tool because you make a tool that won't stop doing what it is built to do, not something that hates every minute of it because then its more likely to AT THE LEAST BE INEFFICIENT implies to him that march wants him to suffer. he doesn't understand that March just has a line there that he won't cross.
so basically. even if none of his paranoia comes true. . . even when march isn't doing anything the very existence of this pact wrecks him.
he is currently blue-screened but PROBABLY ABOUT TO GO VERY CRAZY. there's a couple different ways that could go but there's no way he can maintain this with his sanity intact at all it's just too NOPE for him and he can only blue-screen out for so long.
but FOR NOW. he has forsaken handling life in favor of not handling. just sit there panicky and bitter and hateful and scared and desperate and totally fucking hopeless.
THEY ARE CONSISTENTLY WALKING STRAIGHT INTO EACH OTHER'S DANGERZONES and then going wait that's a warning siren not a victory march? Shark is usually a fatalist when it comes to these things, since. He is unable to break his pacts. But this has a change clause in there. And he has Gil. and enkidu suggested killing march which won't solve his problem and will get his contract renegotiated tighter but is still a thought.
but right now he's not coping well enough for any of that he is just shutting down this is too much. HE IS STILL RESPONDING TO WHAT'S IN FRONT OF HIM BUT ANY COPING THAT APPEARS TO BE HAPPENING IS SPOILERS: FRONTING. most the time he has decided to not feel things. when he has to deal all he wants to do is curl up somewhere put his hands over his ears and scream block out all noise inside his head and worries just nope nope nope. but life continues happening and he shouldn't give more openings so he goes through the motions as he has to.
IF CLEO AND NEFERTI MET WHAT WOULD AMNESIA VER AND NORMAL VER THINK OF EACH OTHER?
Like, Neferti would be a bit :T over the loss of power and ability to protect people, and that she is falling into the team mindset so easily! But on the other hand she's still trying her very hardest to be a PROUD KNIGHT even without memories, and that would make Neferti kinda proud and pretty damn happy.
Cleo, on the other hand, would be less happy and more :T when she finds out about the sig neg that led to the deco wish! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT OUR HONORRRRRRR (you should read that in a zuko voice) She would be less than pleased, basically. She would be a bit happier with the proper knightly thing but finding out the sig neg whenever she gets it is going to give her a major freak out.
So how do you think Celeste is going to go in the future? Will it explode, or implode, will celeste die or will everyone else die, etc?
There's a lot of factors still up in the air! Who our replacement teammate for Dormouse is; how long Lark and Bunny stay estranged, exactly how Shark goes crazy, the circumstances of Jackal coming back, how the games go, ect.
SO TOO MANY THINGS TO PREDICT FOR, I CAN'T DO IT.
DOES CLEO HAVE ANY GOALS OR PLANS IN DECO FOR NOW? IMMEDIATE OR EVENTUAL ARE BOTH FINE
Her immediate goals are to prevent any and all deaths that can be prevented, and to figure out exactly what is up with the portraits. Eventual, she wants to see all of Lilac get their wishes before she worries about her own too much. Also, bring the more murderous portraits to justice because fuck you guys, FIRE.
If Mary was apped as a character, which team would you sort her on? Why?
I sort pretty much entirely on an algorithm of PLAYER ANTI-REQUEST, STRIKE THESE TEAMS OFF --> okay who is left. Which of these teams have spaces. --> Which won't the character clash with. --> WILL THEY UNBALANCE THIS TEAM HORRIBLY? (Like giving Sage another YELLY MARTYR or Celeste another psycho)--> DO WE HAVE ANOTHER BETTER CHARACTER IN MIND FOR THIS TEAM?
if no then YES OKAY YOU GO HERE.
SO. Mary woulllld be eligible for Lilac, Iris, Sage, Fawn, Shell, I think. IT WOULD DEPEND A LOT (AND BY A LOT I MEAN ENTIRELY) on what had slots open and what the current lineups are. S-SORRY MY ANSWER IS BORING SINCE WE DON'T SORT ON TEAM TYPES.
Do you have any plans on ever apping an NPC to Deco?
I do not, really. I would have ot think of a game i like and feel comfortable running, and I'm not really a runner. I'm enjoying playing on the player side of plot a lot, too, so playing both sides feels a little weird! My apping method tends to be 'throw shit at a wall until something sticks' anyway, which I get the feeling is not good for a portrait.
Talk to me about your character and their fashion senses! What do their wardrobes look like?
PACKRAT has bad taste, his sensibilities are best described as like, half-assed corporate goth. WOULDN'T ACTUALLY PASS THE WORK DRESS CODE, NICE TRY. But nice black formal leather shoes, black formal slacks with pleats in them. UP TOP is where it breaks down, he has five ear piercings, wears a leather collar with a buckle. Usually wearing a high necked sleeveless shirt. LIKES COATS, about peacoat length or a little shorter but they always look longer because he won't keep things on his fucking shoulders, they're always falling down, then sleeves rolled up to make up for it. SOMETIMES A NICE VEST and then he has a nice menswear formal shirt on and that instead is what's falling off his shoulders. Color scheme is all black and white, always wears black gloves. No jewelry aside from piercings. White is rarely used in solid pieces, more likely to be checkerboard or pinstripes on a black item.
MARY dresses in mostly light colors, whites and creams and lavender, a little bit of brown. Clothes are a weird awful mix of mori girl and sleepwear... Shorts that are really short with either a slip or a babydoll top that goes long in the back, with a long loose mori girl coat and sometimes laceknit mufflers. WHEN IT'S REALLY COLD she sometimes wears an ankle length or mind-calf bohemian skirt. LACEY AND LIGHT AND NOT FORM FITTING but not really wearing enough clothes ever. looks as though she rolled out bed, made a token effort and then gave up on dressing herself. NO SHOES.
maribelle dressed differently yes.
...and yes this assumes access to a wardrobe since really Shark is stuck wearing what he showed up in, and soon, uniform, BUT YES. IF GIVEN THEIR CHOICE
Cleo's fashion sense is more or less a big ?????. She likes her military knight uniform thingy, and tends to wear boring stuff. Pants, a short-sleeved shirt, long jacket. Lots of pockets (not... liefeld level, but enough that she is never without a place to carry small objects when they become necessary). She never really wears anything fashionable or fancy past the fancy ceremonial knight dress uniform shit. Skirts are right out. (Also, all of her pants have a hole with a button in the back for her tail.)
On the other hand, if she does not have to worry about going anywhere or looking presentable to anyone, her choices are much less. Boyshorts or loose shorts that don't actually touch the leg, sleeveless stuff, and so on. Clothing over fur is weird and itchy even if she is used to it, so she does avoid it when given the chance, but that isn't really a chance she gets very often. (That she willingly wears armor over clothing over fur should tell you just how dedicated to this knight thing she is.)
After that thread with Tamaki, Shell hands down. Froofy bastards on the whole yes, but Tamaki has healed him before, he has him mark on Kaoru, likes Mint, Tamaki is showing him sympathy while he is down and out and even though he knows Tamaki is the type it caught him off guard.
Other than that, he doesn't mind Canary on the whole. Didn't let the thing where March killed one of their teammates explode; King is pretty cool with whatever, so his team and their acceptance of the situation gets some points too.
Any memories you have locked off your registry for now and why?
I've got two, though I only remember my rationale for one, so I may end up unlocking the other.
So basically Neferti's wish in Deco is to clear up the fact that she was framed for treason and restore her honor! She has the trial for her treason as unlocked, but I've locked off the actual time she was accused and thus the actual firm knowledge of her own innocence. Mostly I just want to see where that will go! How huge will her freakout be, etc.
I think the other one, the actual time she achieved her rank and took the huge oath thingy, I just didn't want to write out the speech yet.
Shark has nothing locked off, but I might do a turnabout and put the human memories he has on priority on locked because human feelings are really the last thing he needs in being able to cope with having a pact with March. And those would be locked off just because of that, yes.
ON THE INVERSE, memories you're looking forward to her receiving?
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like, to be honest, to say he is handling at all is an overstatement. He has more or less noped out completely. He is functioning only on a very surface level, annoyed when people congratulate him, sarcastic and insulting as usual, clearly everything is fine!!
But in actuality he's had the rug pulled out from beneath him completely. First off, dying by being stabbed to death was a sudden forceful reminder that he's not in power here, and that he is vulnerable and mortal for the first time in a very long time. Fear of not being able to survive, fear of pain, BASIC HUMAN FEARS are pretty alien to him and he was bluntly introduced to them in an awful way.
He also was suddenly made aware that his tormenting March had an effect. WHICH HE DIDN'T ACTUALLY KNOW, or he would have stopped sooner. Because that's. All he wanted. He and March would fight and he would accidentally hit a weak spot or March would hit a weak spot and the other would retaliate but BASICALLY he found out the way to even the score and score one up on March was pain because then he would go quiet and STOP ATTACKING HIM which is originally all he wanted. But he is himself and he liked the rush and March never stopped fighting he always got right back up and attacked him again. So Shark had no idea he was cracking March! OR THAT HIS THREATS WERE THAT AWFUL. he does not have food buttons, he doesn't need to eat, ALICE IS NOT HERE SO WHY IS THREATENING TO TAKE HIM AWAY WHEN THE PERSON IN QUESTION DOESN'T EVEN EXIST HERE A BIG DEAL?? ONCE HE WINS IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN FUCKING ENFORCE THAT. He just wanted to stop losing. SO. HE HAD HIS WINNING TURN OUT TO BE HEY YOU ACTUALLY FUCKED UP REALLY BADLY AND WERE FUCKING UP THIS DUDE AND IT IS COMING TO BITE YOU.
his denial coping mechanism shattered hard too because suddenly comes to terms with what he's been doing + sudden oh god mortality pain stabbing MARCH FEAR. and march comes at him immediately and dismembers him and has him make a pact. he has enough presence of mind to negotiate in a clause to keep his body his own (reasons why that is important to him is a whole other mini-essay) and also to keep their contract mutable, rather than a sealed deal. BECAUSE HE HAS SOME SERIOUS CONTRACT FEAR.
but he knows he gave march serious reason to hate him. and he did give a paranoid like eight paragraph ramble of shit march could do to him if March felt like the effort and march confirmed HE HAS BETTER THINGS TO DO which basically to Shark means I will ruin you and your everything as long as it is easy, not worth the effort to do anything like that. He can't comprehend March not wanting serious vengeance if those lines he had no idea were there were crossed that badly.
And now March is basically. Crossing his lines. :')
he isn't cleaning his room from the way march wrecked it and isn't collecting new things because he's unable to hold onto anything because then it's march's and it could be taken away just to fuck with him and EVEN IF THEY AREN'T they are of no comfort to him but rather a paranoia source. he hates most his teammates now. orchard cake party confirmed that he has no allies and no one gives a fuck about what happened to him he is on his own he has screwed himself over. his denial mechanism of being able to go I WANTED THIS THIS IS WHAT I WAS AIMING FOR HAHA LOOK WHAT I CAN DO NOW is still broken. march keeps poking at him and making threats he has no intention of carrying out but shark doesn't know that and hates being reliant on that "kindness". march keeps reminding him that he fucked up and did this to himself.
also that he hasn't been rewritten is a source of scream to him because HE'S BEEN REWRITTEN BEFORE AND THAT HE HASN'T IMPLIES MARCH WANTS SOMETHING FROM HIM. BECAUSE MARCH DIDN'T CONTRACT YOU CAN NOW NEVER HURT ME AGAIN, it was for full control. So if he wants full control and apparently doesn't want a tool because you make a tool that won't stop doing what it is built to do, not something that hates every minute of it because then its more likely to AT THE LEAST BE INEFFICIENT implies to him that march wants him to suffer. he doesn't understand that March just has a line there that he won't cross.
so basically. even if none of his paranoia comes true. . . even when march isn't doing anything the very existence of this pact wrecks him.
he is currently blue-screened but PROBABLY ABOUT TO GO VERY CRAZY. there's a couple different ways that could go but there's no way he can maintain this with his sanity intact at all it's just too NOPE for him and he can only blue-screen out for so long.
but FOR NOW. he has forsaken handling life in favor of not handling. just sit there panicky and bitter and hateful and scared and desperate and totally fucking hopeless.
THEY ARE CONSISTENTLY WALKING STRAIGHT INTO EACH OTHER'S DANGERZONES and then going wait that's a warning siren not a victory march? Shark is usually a fatalist when it comes to these things, since. He is unable to break his pacts. But this has a change clause in there. And he has Gil. and enkidu suggested killing march which won't solve his problem and will get his contract renegotiated tighter but is still a thought.
but right now he's not coping well enough for any of that he is just shutting down this is too much. HE IS STILL RESPONDING TO WHAT'S IN FRONT OF HIM BUT ANY COPING THAT APPEARS TO BE HAPPENING IS SPOILERS: FRONTING. most the time he has decided to not feel things. when he has to deal all he wants to do is curl up somewhere put his hands over his ears and scream block out all noise inside his head and worries just nope nope nope. but life continues happening and he shouldn't give more openings so he goes through the motions as he has to.
IF CLEO AND NEFERTI MET WHAT WOULD AMNESIA VER AND NORMAL VER THINK OF EACH OTHER?
no subject
Like, Neferti would be a bit :T over the loss of power and ability to protect people, and that she is falling into the team mindset so easily! But on the other hand she's still trying her very hardest to be a PROUD KNIGHT even without memories, and that would make Neferti kinda proud and pretty damn happy.
Cleo, on the other hand, would be less happy and more :T when she finds out about the sig neg that led to the deco wish! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT OUR HONORRRRRRR (you should read that in a zuko voice) She would be less than pleased, basically. She would be a bit happier with the proper knightly thing but finding out the sig neg whenever she gets it is going to give her a major freak out.
So how do you think Celeste is going to go in the future? Will it explode, or implode, will celeste die or will everyone else die, etc?
no subject
There's a lot of factors still up in the air! Who our replacement teammate for Dormouse is; how long Lark and Bunny stay estranged, exactly how Shark goes crazy, the circumstances of Jackal coming back, how the games go, ect.
SO TOO MANY THINGS TO PREDICT FOR, I CAN'T DO IT.
DOES CLEO HAVE ANY GOALS OR PLANS IN DECO FOR NOW? IMMEDIATE OR EVENTUAL ARE BOTH FINE
no subject
If Mary was apped as a character, which team would you sort her on? Why?
no subject
if no then YES OKAY YOU GO HERE.
SO. Mary woulllld be eligible for Lilac, Iris, Sage, Fawn, Shell, I think. IT WOULD DEPEND A LOT (AND BY A LOT I MEAN ENTIRELY) on what had slots open and what the current lineups are. S-SORRY MY ANSWER IS BORING SINCE WE DON'T SORT ON TEAM TYPES.
Do you have any plans on ever apping an NPC to Deco?
no subject
Talk to me about your character and their fashion senses! What do their wardrobes look like?
no subject
MARY dresses in mostly light colors, whites and creams and lavender, a little bit of brown. Clothes are a weird awful mix of mori girl and sleepwear... Shorts that are really short with either a slip or a babydoll top that goes long in the back, with a long loose mori girl coat and sometimes laceknit mufflers. WHEN IT'S REALLY COLD she sometimes wears an ankle length or mind-calf bohemian skirt. LACEY AND LIGHT AND NOT FORM FITTING but not really wearing enough clothes ever. looks as though she rolled out bed, made a token effort and then gave up on dressing herself. NO SHOES.
maribelle dressed differently yes.
...and yes this assumes access to a wardrobe since really Shark is stuck wearing what he showed up in, and soon, uniform, BUT YES. IF GIVEN THEIR CHOICE
I LIKE THIS QUESTION REVERSE.
no subject
On the other hand, if she does not have to worry about going anywhere or looking presentable to anyone, her choices are much less. Boyshorts or loose shorts that don't actually touch the leg, sleeveless stuff, and so on. Clothing over fur is weird and itchy even if she is used to it, so she does avoid it when given the chance, but that isn't really a chance she gets very often. (That she willingly wears armor over clothing over fur should tell you just how dedicated to this knight thing she is.)
What are Shark's favorite non-Celeste teams?
no subject
Other than that, he doesn't mind Canary on the whole. Didn't let the thing where March killed one of their teammates explode; King is pretty cool with whatever, so his team and their acceptance of the situation gets some points too.
Any memories you have locked off your registry for now and why?
no subject
So basically Neferti's wish in Deco is to clear up the fact that she was framed for treason and restore her honor! She has the trial for her treason as unlocked, but I've locked off the actual time she was accused and thus the actual firm knowledge of her own innocence. Mostly I just want to see where that will go! How huge will her freakout be, etc.
I think the other one, the actual time she achieved her rank and took the huge oath thingy, I just didn't want to write out the speech yet.
Reverse!
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ON THE INVERSE, memories you're looking forward to her receiving?
no subject
more specifically the trial signeg that will lead to a massive freakout
and basically all of the grandpa memories because they are the only significant relationship she had and it is full of dere and happy.
(I actually need to go reorder her memory registry because I am combining and separating parts of it and making it less weird)
I AM... OUT OF QUESTIONS reverse that too!